Day...5?

Ok, so Its been a while since I've updated, here you go:
-Played KotOR : Got up to the Sith enclave.
-Played with Erin: Seriously have to find a way to make her stop biting, and a way to call her over... I need to start using the treats more.
-Wrote 1.5 papers that were due a week ago, the .5 not the 1. I just got it done in time.
-Not going to Spanish Class: Its just really doesn't seem worth all the work and effort
-Watching Bones: Ok, I think i have been watching way too much, but now I'm up to the point where I can't help myself.
-Not getting my ticket done: Ok, as I'm writing this, I realize that I don't want to pay a huge fine...so I'm going to be picking that one up right after I finish blogging.

So whats my beef? I can't get properly motivated. I have no idea what the fuck to do and I know Allie's upset because it's not very fair for me to be playing videogames while she's toiling away, doing homework, taking care of Erin, cleaning up, and cooking (though I feel that I have been contributing more to the cooking and cleaning dept.). I feel pathetic, and I know it sucks and I know I need to straighten up and fly right, but i have no will to do so. Its insane, and depressing. Because all I want to do is play video games. I look back and I remember having fun working with clothes, having a job, getting involved with my classes and doing homework that i was interested in. Maybe its just my classes, I'm just not interested in Japanese, or Business, or Spanish...But then what do I want? I don't want to be wasting everybody's time, including my own, just finding out what I like. Maybe its my self destructive personality. who knows, for all I care I was switched at birth with an alien looking like me, and now I have to live in a world and society that is naturally foreign to me. Maybe I'm just some deadbeat that doesn't know how tho take care of his own shit. I wish I fucking knew though, then at least I could begin on fixing the problem. It's like trying to diagnose a system. Everything is failing but you can't find out why. Usually its the simplest of reasons, loose wiring, new power supply, but what do I do if its some kind of factory default? I can't just get shit replaced, it needs to be fixed. but how?